shortly after i bought my plane ticket to molokai, i thought “i did it again.”
over eager for adventure and something new, i took off on my own, alone…yet again.
sophomore year of hell, was mostly done on my own. with no community. no support. so incredibly alone. i had to fight so hard to survive. that i didn’t know how to stop. i didn’t know how to let down my defenses. i didn’t trust anyone anymore. so much healing was necessary from that.
and when i was 18 i was pretty alone too. i decided to move to the Dominican Republic for a semester to teach english before i went to college. i wanted adventure – not containment in another classroom. and the DR was amazing. i didn’t know anyone, i didn’t go with an organization, i just heard about a school that needed help, contacted them and bought a plane ticket. they found a host family for me the day after i got there. “sorry no habla ingles.” i was sorry too. but i loved that family and learned how to live out that love without language. yet i was very alone at times. and when i left, i thought i understood why Jesus sent them out in pairs, and thought the next time i went to some entirely unknown place, i ought to consider taking someone along.
and so when i realized i was again heading out alone…i thought i was in for another long haul of loneliness again.
but i was wrong.
even on an island, no man is an island.
because of the size and isolation of Molokai, there is a strong sense of community among the residents. and a very close-knit familyof believers.
so i am not alone.
and i am learning this:
To find ‘ourselves’ then is to find not only our poor, limited, perplexed souls, but to find the power of God that raised Christ from the dead and ‘built us together in Him unto a habitation of God in the Spirit.’ (Eph. 2:2) This discovery of Christ is never genuine if it is nothing but a flight from ourselves. On the contrary, it cannot be an escape. It must be a fulfillment. I cannot discover God in myself and myself in Him unless I have the courage to face myself exactly as I am, with all my limitations, and to accept others as they are, with all their limitations.”
[no man is an island]